Sunday, June 19, 2011

dark girls..

Dark Girls: Preview from Bradinn French on Vimeo.

That hit a soft spot..makes me wonder about how my relationship was with my ex. He is lighter than me and he always used to crack a joke about my skin here and there. Now it took me a while to realize that I was beautiful, unfortunately, but this clip made me wonder what what he was thinking when he would say "if this doesn't work out I'm going back to white girls" or he'll talk to other people saying "oh you gonna get darker than her."..things gotta change...

hello fear.

Kirk Franklin's album is amazing, very inspirational and heartfelt like always. I've been listening to it ever since I downloaded it. lol but the 2nd track is him saying this poem. Its called the story of fear.

I can't sing but I'm gonna work hard for you to like me
Didn't dream 'cuz if I fail then I might be
What they said I was could I ever say I did it
Tell yay now that I'm second to admit it
Insecure I can't understand the application
If I applied myself I guess there'd be no situation
But who teaches who when everyday's a substitute
I tried to plant love but it never took root
My soul's got weeds and the roots are too deep
The roots don't sail 'cuz the roots are too deep
ADDC my roots too deep
A kid too afraid to close his eyes and sleep
Can't you hear me studder everytime I speak
Fear said hello when she left me weak
Love me and left me with abandonment issues
Pains a secret but it illuminates in you then it creates a menu
But sin on your plate you don't know until later how much ever you ate
Now I'm watching my weight
Will this album be my best one?
But if it's not y'all on to the next one
So hello fear it's about time we speak
It may take a while cause our roots run deep

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Goodwill Hunting.

Tommorow I'm going to the Goodwill, because that's all I can afford.

- black leather bag.
- quilted bag
- leather belts
- silky blouses
- denim button ups
- patterned head scarves
- vintage jewelry
- denim shorts
- rompers
- vests

I'll be posting up the pics of the stuff later.

march 14th.


my sandal list.
1.Jeffrey Campbell Southern Exposure Sandal-$107 (these are nearest and dearest to my heart)
2.Coral Ensemble Sandal-$33
3.Flor-all Together Now Sandal-$33
4.Matinee Marathon Sandal-$33
5.Haute Hiking Sandal-$33 

I defiantly need to step my sandal game up.

see more pretty sandals click here

tattoo ideas

Im really into the birds flying idea...

(pics are from tumblr)

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

story of my life...

"When someone walks out of your life, let them. There’s no use in wasting your time on people that leave you. What you make of yourself and your future is no longer tied to them. Yeah, you may miss them, but remember that you weren’t the first one to give up."

My boyfriend broke up with me yesterday for no reason, and I'm having trouble getting over it.  I was supposed to get a place with him, get married have a kid. Well I wasn't supposed to but he led me to believe that, we talked about it on a daily basis. It hurts, so much. My stomach is churning with disbelief. But I guess thats the first part of moving on. I'll be enjoying the rest of the week depressed. I just feel like a fool, i don't know how to cope. I'll be fine, I just need some time. I know everybodys been through the first week, or couple of weeks or even months of heartache. What are ways that made your heartache a lil less achy?


This blog is for me, a documentation for personal growth, my life, living for Jesus and whatever else comes to mind. I just feel a new beginning coming around my corner and i feel the need to have a new blog , yet again. (this is the fourth blog iv'e made so far). With that being said, enjoy! I know I will be... the way I'm shani.